No one gets married thinking they will get divorced someday. But when a divorce occurs, former spouses may feel like they are lost in a new, unfamiliar world, and may allow the stress of a divorce to impact how they treat their children, or they may feel that they are involved in a competition for a child’s love now that they do not see them all the time. Sometimes, adults alter their parenting in ways that do not help their children or themselves. 

Here are four ways to approach parenting which will protect important parent-child relationships and allow your family to heal from the difficulties of divorce:

Halloween is not a major holiday, so it is a day that often is not listed in parenting agreements, but it can be one of the biggest days of the year for young children. Divorced or separated parents should respect what should be a great time for their kids. Here are some ways parents can work together on Halloween, even though they are no longer together:

1. Remember Who Halloween Is For

Halloween is about the kids, not about you. If you are early in the divorce process, and emotions are still raw, you may prefer to step away for the day if you think you cannot handle the situation properly. As with the other holidays, it may be best to divide Halloween between parents on alternating years. If you can participate in Halloween activities together with your children, that is great. If not, do not force it and ruin what should be a good time.

The end of a marriage is frequently painful for everyone involved, including parents and children. Parents may not always understand the effects that divorce can have on their children. Kids rarely fully grasp the reason for the split, but they may find themselves acting as the middlemen between feuding parents. By the end of the divorce process, many children experience stress and anxiety, and the emotional scars can follow them well into adulthood, and into their future relationships. 

If you are planning to get divorced, you can help your child cope with the decision by avoiding these common parenting mistakes:

For any person over the age of 18, there is no better time than the present to create a Last Will & Testament. Nobody likes to think about what will happen after they pass away, but a Will is a person’s way of ensuring that everything they leave behind (their estate) is handled the way that they prefer.

In the unfortunate event that a person passes away without a Last Will & Testament, their estate (the sum of their assets minus any liabilities/debts owed at that time) will be divided up according to the laws of the state of Illinois, which means the estate may be divided up in a different way from what the person actually wanted.

Even the healthiest and most stable marriages have times of doubt. Feelings of stress and uncertainty arising out of an argument, for example, can lead to one party or both parties questioning if the marriage is one that will last. However, no couple agrees on every minute detail of everything, undoubtedly each of you will go to bed angry at least once, and you will not always do everything together. In many cases, those “tried-and-true” adages your friends and family tell you on your wedding day are unrealistic and can leave you questioning the success of your marriage after any unresolved argument. However, before you consider divorce, review these proven signs of a successful and thriving marriage:

You Have Fun Together