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Posted on in Divorce

Hillside family law attorneyEven the healthiest and most stable marriages have times of doubt. Feelings of stress and uncertainty arising out of an argument, for example, can lead to one party or both parties questioning if the marriage is one that will last. However, no couple agrees on every minute detail of everything, undoubtedly each of you will go to bed angry at least once, and you will not always do everything together. In many cases, those “tried-and-true” adages your friends and family tell you on your wedding day are unrealistic and can leave you questioning the success of your marriage after any unresolved argument. However, before you consider divorce, review these proven signs of a successful and thriving marriage:

You Have Fun Together

Not every marriage will be the ideal, picture perfect, Hollywood-ready love story one of you or both of you might have expected when you walked down the aisle. The romance and glamor which may have been associated with the dating, engagement, and honeymoon phases of your relationship will eventually fade. However, the relationships of couples who make it a point to spend time together and who enjoy each other’s company frequently last longer than many other relationships.

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Illinois parenting time attorneyDivorcing a spouse that is on the narcissism spectrum is not an easy task. The situation can become even more challenging if there are children involved. Already vulnerable to the potentially harmful effects of divorce, children could be used as pawns by the narcissist, a tool that can be used against the other parent.

This kind of activity, known as parental alienation, can have a lifelong negative impact on every relationship that the child will ever have – and that includes the relationship they have with you. Learn how to reduce the risk of this occurring in your divorce, and discover how an experienced divorce attorney can help.

Narcissism and Parental Alienation

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Illinois divorce lawyerIt used to be said that children were resilient, and they could recover easily from divorce. We now know this is not true. Recent studies suggest that children may experience a host of problems both during and after divorce, from emotional, behavioral and mental health problems, to maladjustment and developmental issues. Thankfully, parents can mitigate against such problems. The following information explains how.

Strive for a Child-Centered Divorce

It might not have felt this way, but your child has always been separate from your marriage. Yes, you and your spouse may have conceived and parented together, but the relationship that each of you has with your child is individual, special, and unique. Though the marriage is ending, the bond between the child and each parent will remain. Parents who remember this and strive to protect not just their own relationship with the child, but also the child’s relationship with the other parent, often see fewer negative issues in their children during and after the divorce process. So, put away the team shirt, watch what you say around your child, and avoid oversharing details about the divorce and you may successfully protect your child’s need for unconditional love, time, and attention from both of their parents.

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Hillside IL divorce attorneyA divorce can be a complicated and arduous process because there are numerous potential pitfalls and challenges – and money is often the most significant concern. However, many parties overlook important financial planning details when they first file for divorce. The result of this oversight can range from a minor loss of some funds, to complete financial devastation. Learn how to mitigate against the potential money issues in your Illinois divorce with effective financial planning, and discover how an experienced divorce lawyer can help.

Start Your Post-Divorce Budget Now

It may seem a bit premature, planning your post-divorce budget now, but having an idea of how much money you will be bringing in (and what you expect to spend) as you work through the divorce process can save you a great deal of time, money, and stress in the future. Consider also how you plan to spend your post-divorce settlement. Will you sell the house and move into a smaller place to give yourself more financial breathing room each month? Who will pay for the kids’ college expenses? Also, do not forget to save for personal goals, such as vacations or a new vehicle.

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Illinois divorce lawyerWhen your marriage is failing, and you know divorce is the next step, you may stop to consider how your children will respond. If you determine that they simply cannot handle growing up in a broken home – perhaps because of a disability, a sensitive demeanor, or a rough upbringing – you may be tempted to put off the inevitable. Are you really doing your children a favor though, or are you doing more harm than good? The answer may rest in the underlying issues of your marriage. Learn more with help from the following information.

Domestic Violence and Children

If there is any marriage in which divorce should not be delayed, it is one in which domestic violence is present. Violence of any sort can have a negative impact on the growth and development of a child, and it may also increase the child’s risk for several mental health conditions, such as depression, aggression, and anxiety. Furthermore, children may ultimately be at risk for violence themselves, even if they are not currently the target. If you are a victim of violence, do not wait. Get help immediately. Seek out services tailored especially for victims and contact an experienced family law attorney for assistance with your divorce.

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